journalin' gma

Happy Birthday Sweetheart!

2011-01-26T20:23:00.000-06:00

Tomorrow - January 27th will be my Sweethearts Birthday. Ron will be 48 years young.

Anyone that knows me, knows that I am absolutely in LOVE with my husband, but it's so much more than that. I have so much admiration and respect for him. When I read Psalm 84:5 "Blessed is the man whose strength is in YOU" I am reminded of my husband and thank God for him.

What a gift of a husband God has given me . . . someone to grow in faith with me, a man of character, one who steps up to the plate and does the hard things, the important things that sometimes need to be done. A strong, supportive source of love, and encouragement. While he is all these things to / for me, my heart is drawn even closer to him and melts as I see him with our children and grandchildren.

Happy Birthday Babe! I pray that you have a wonderful day!

Cake Decorating

2011-01-21T14:46:00.009-06:00

You may have heard me say that I do not have a creative bone in my body and that is true. With that said . . . I have always wanted to decorate cakes. This baffles my husband since no one in our family really eats cake. In fact, our girls always had ice cream cakes for their birthdays because they don’t like cake. Even so, I dream of creating beautiful cakes. I frequently watch and absolutely love the show “Cake Boss”! The cakes are amazing and the people are so much fun. Obviously, I never expect to be anywhere near that good – but it’s nice to dream.

For years I have put cake decorating classes on my “wish list”. My husband would always shake his head and move on to the next item on the list, not taking me seriously. Once I asked why he never got me that for Christmas or whatever the gift giving occasion and he said that we don’t like cakes and I don’t like to cook so what’s the use. I must admit, there’s some to logic to that. So for the next several years I would remind myself of that and even began to omit it from my “wish list”.

In the days leading up to Christmas, Stephanie kept telling me that she was my favorite daughter and she had gotten me the best Christmas present of all. Not knowing what she was talking about, but loving her enthusiasm over her gift, I would always agree with her. Then on Christmas morning, I opened up my gift to find the long awaited “CAKE DECORATING CLASSES” and student kit had been purchased for me!! Classes start Feb. 3rd! We will see how it goes. Would love to be able to make cool cakes or cupcakes for my grandbabies!!

Have I lost my first love?

2011-01-19T11:15:00.007-06:00

Recently this question was posed to me. Humm . . . The world might think that it was referring to my husband, the absolute love of my life. It’s actually referring to “My Lord Jesus Christ”. As I reflect on Rev. 2:4; "But I have this complaint against you. You don't love me or each other as you did at first!” I have to ask myself if I am guilty of losing my first love.

As my mind travels back to the time when my Husband and I were called into full time ministry, I am reminded of the excitement, the desire, and anticipation of a life fully focused on serving our Lord, his people, and leading them to the saving grace of Jesus Christ. I have to ask myself; “Where did that passion and excitement go?” Don’t get me wrong, there was plenty of anxiety and uncertainty at what lay ahead but always a peace that comes from being completely in God’s will and doing what he has called you to do.

You see, my husband and I had spent over 20 years in Corporate America while serving faithfully in our local church before God called us into full time ministry. My naïve mind thought that our lives would be void of the worldly trivial frustrations we had endured up to that point. Somehow I thought that; there would be no more family arguments, no more frustrations over how to spend money, no more stresses at work, no more hurt feelings or misunderstandings, I would be accepted and integrated into whatever local church body God called us to quickly and easily, there would be no more gossip or unkind words, others would want to be involved with our ministry, etc. Of course it would be different, after all, isn’t Gods work far more important than anything else we might do? I can’t imagine what I was thinking. . . .

The devil took this opportunity to show me that when you submit to God’s will for your life – he will attack with a vengeance, and we experienced that in full force. Over the next several years, we would see relationships fracture, finances flail, health falter, and ministry fall. We experienced / endured attacks that were unfathomable, at least to us, but we had survived. That’s right; we had survived, only survived. I can’t say we were victorious though.

With that said, I return to the original question; “Have I lost my first love?” I must confess that I have. I have allowed inappropriate / unrealistic expectations and circumstances to rob me of the love I had for God and His people. For that I ask forgiveness.

You see when God called Ron and I; he never said it would be easy. In fact, scripture tells us in Matthew 16:24; “Then said Jesus unto his disciples, If any [man] will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me.” What part of”take up his cross” did I think would be easy? I find my answer in 1 Peter 2:21; “For God called you to do good, even if it means suffering, just as Christ suffered for you. He is your example, and you must follow in his steps.” While that does not sound enticing, I find encouragement in Hebrews 12:2 “Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God” and James 1:2 “Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds”.

Friend

2010-08-06T15:07:00.000-05:00

What is a Friend?

Webster defines friend as:
1 a : one attached to another by affection or esteem 2 a : one that is not hostile b : one that is of the same nation, party, or group3 : one that favors or promotes something (as a charity)4 : a favored companion

Webster defines perceived as:
1 a : to attain awareness or understanding of
b : to regard as being such 2 : to become aware of through the senses;

Webster defines acquaintance as:
1 a : the state of being acquainted
b : personal knowledge : familiarity2 a : the persons with whom one is acquainted
b : a person whom one knows but who is not a particularly close friend

According to Mr. Webster, I’d say a friend is some you enjoy being around, feel close to and think highly of.

Recently I’ve found myself reflecting quite a bit on friends or maybe I should say perceived friends. The idea of a friend is not complex; however, being a friend can be.

It is so easy to introduce others as your friend, but are they really? Sometimes it’s one-sided. Or maybe they are just an acquaintance? How do you discern the difference? Is the word “friend” used too liberally? Regardless, it can be heartbreaking to find out that perception is often not reality. When that happens how do you pick up the pieces and go on? How do you protect your heart and spirit while continuing to be open, loving, caring, etc.? Is that even possible? Especially when you are called to minister to others?

When reality comes knocking, often times there will be questions that plague us such as: “Why”, “What did I do”, “What could I have done differently”, etc. or personal indictments such as: “I’m not good enough”, “It’s all my fault”, “I should have been a better friend”, “I should have . . .”, etc. Or you may get angry and feel betrayed: “They only come around when they want something”, “I’m only good enough when they have a problem”, etc. How do we steer clear of this path?

Do real friends exist? Where are they? How do you prevent yourself from withdrawing and donning protective armor?

Our God is a relational God that knows how important others are to us. He came to this earth, was perfect, and yet not everyone was his friend. How can that be? Seems far fetched but if our perfect God was not befriended by all, how can we expect to? While our minds tell us this – it does nothing to diminish the pain that comes from such rejection.

True friends are rare and we should cherish them!

Some words of wisdom from God’s Word:

John 15:13
Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends.

Proverbs 22:24
Do not make friends with a hot-tempered man, do not associate with one easily angered.

Proverbs 18:24
A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.

Proverbs 12:26
A righteous man is cautious in friendship, but the way of the wicked leads them astray.

Proverbs 19:6
Many curry favor with a ruler, and everyone is the friend of a man who gives gifts.

Proverbs 20:6
Many will say they are loyal friends, but who can find one who is truly reliable?

Proverbs 18:19
An offended friend is harder to win back than a fortified city. Arguments separate friends like a gate locked with bars.

Proverbs 11:9
With their words, the godless destroy their friends, but knowledge will rescue the righteous.

Girl Talk Wednesday

2008-12-03T12:58:00.000-06:00

Tell me a dirty little secret of yours - Haley won

Girl Talk Wednesday

2008-12-03T12:39:00.001-06:00

What do you think MY favorite GTW post was?...and Who won that post?

Things that make you smile. The winner was me.

Or it could have been how you met and married your spouse. I think that was me as well.

Oh this is bad - hope I win!!!

Girl Talk Wednesday

2008-12-01T12:29:00.000-06:00

What was my favorite GTW Topic?

I really liked the creative way to convey 3 things you are thankful for. I loved all the pics Brittany had posted. One of these days, I want to learn how to do that!!!

I will miss GTW even though I didn't always participate or on time.

Girl Talk Wednesday

2008-11-12T14:38:00.000-06:00

I seem to be cutting it close on these days!
Topic:
Tell me something that makes you laugh (no text)...and not about your husband or kids!

I read this on an email and thought it was HILARIOUS!

Girl Talk Wednesday

2008-11-05T07:46:00.000-06:00

How did I meet Ron, how did we get engagend, and what was our wedding like?

Ron and I actually met in the 7th grade. We were child hood sweethearts. We went our seperate ways for a few years but always remained close friends. Then in our junior year of high school Ron started confiding in me about issues he had with his current girl friend. Well - to be honest - she wasn't all that and I thought he needed to dump her. So as I counseled him on this issue, he began to see how she wasn't good for him. Within a couple of weeks, we were dating.

Engagement . . . well we seemed to know that we were going to get married. I'm not sure how it happened but it just seemed to be understood. One night on the way home from a date, I realized that Ron had never formally asked me to marry him and pointed that out to him. So he pulled the car over on the side of the road and proposed.

Wedding . . . My mother was not involved in planning my wedding at all. I was a senior in high school trying to do it on my own. Needless to say, it had issues. Our colors were green and yellow. My future mother-in-law and I made the bridesmaid dresses. My godmother bought my wedding dress. A friend from church made our wedding cake. A friend from work took our pictures. Ron's grandmother made all the flowers. A childhood pastor married us at a little bitty country church. My mother made ham, potatoe salad, and beans for the reception that was held at our little house out in the country. I had a maid of honor and three bridesmaids. My little sister was the flower girl. My nephew was the ring bearer. My two sister-in-laws were the candlelighters. My mother was 1/2 hour late getting to the wedding - so it started late. My step-dads watch started playing "The Yellow Rose of Texas" in the middle of the ceremony - the only problem is that we were living in Missouri! One of my bridesmaids had altered her dress prior to the wedding and we had to quickly make some changes to put it back like it was. And last but not least - no one ever told me that I needed to watch the time of month so that came as well!

Oh well - that was 27 1/2 years ago so it seems to have lasted regardless of all the mishaps!

For our 25th wedding anniversary our daughters helped make it a special occasion as we renewed our vows. Brittany planned and organized a beautiful ceremony followed by a wonderful dinner / reception at Salt Grass. We had several special friends come from Arkansas as well as my work to be a part of this celebration. Ron rented the tux he wore in Britt's wedding and I bought a new dress from Davids' Bridal. Ron and I stayed away the night before so the girls could decorate our house (where the ceremony was held). Shawnda fixed my hair and helped with the logistics of getting people from one location to the other. After the dinner, we all went to the motel where we were staying and swam in the pool! It was a very special day!!!!

Girl Talk Wednesday

2008-10-29T10:44:00.000-05:00

Last week:
Tell me a dirty little secret of yours! To help out in keeping this a secret, you can tell me two lies and one truth...the truth is your REAL secret!
My answer:

I'm afraid! Of many things. Not being what God has called me to be. Not being the wife I should be to my husband or the mother my daughters need or a Godly grandmother for my little Ethan and Titus? What is in store for our future? Where will God call us to go. Will my family be close? Will they (anyone) like me? These are only few of my fears. And while I know that God is here and sufficient - I still struggle.

Girl Talk Wednesday (on Saturday)

2008-10-11T22:06:00.000-05:00

1. When was the last time I shaved my legs? Sometime last week - maybe tomorrow.
2. What body part do I like best - what body part do I like least? Best: My hands - to love on others. Least: My eyelashes - they can't be seen with out mascara.
3. One Beauty Secret - Wear a smile, it's encouraging and attractive.
4. Something for me? To have all of my children and grandchildren living close so I could see them weekly as well as worship and minister together.
5. Ideas for Girl Talk - What are your favorite girl activities

Girl Talk Wednesday

2008-10-04T14:01:00.000-05:00

Five things that make me feel girly:

1. Manicure & Pedicure

2. All dressed up in a fancy / frilly dress or outfit

3. Hair and makeup all done up

4. High heels

5. Fun jewelry

Test

2008-09-30T13:46:00.000-05:00

This is my first attempt at this type of thing, so here it goes.

Brittany, my oldest daughter, created this awesome blog for me. Now I just have to figure out what to say without looking too stupid! As much as I work around systems you would never know it in my personal life. I like for things to be simple and I don't care for change - at all. A good example is my cell phone. All I really need is something that will receive and send both calls and texts (only recently began texting). So when my phone started acting up - Britt offered to let me have her old one. Very nice of her. My husband switched the sims cards out and handed it to me saying "here you go". OK - that's a problem. How do I work this? Her old one is a Blackberry and my old one is a razor! Totally different phones. I stumbled through it for a day and after much frustration - had a friend put the sim card back in my razor! I admit defeat!! Life is way to short to get totally frustrated over something so inconsequential.

So . . . my phone still has issues - but I'm dealing with it. In the mean time, Britt has promised to show me how to navigate this new contraption. Time will tell!!